How To Avoid Being Jealous

Jealousy is an ugly quality that I’m sure we all want to avoid. It can kill a moment and just create the worst tension in a room if you or someone else there is the one exhibiting this negative trait. It’s not a word that you necessarily want someone to describe you as either. So how can we avoid? How can we keep this less than attractive quality from wrecking havoc on what could potentially be a good day? Today I want to share with you how I’ve personally been able to distance myself more and more from this trait.

Let’s be honest. When we’re feeling jealous, it’s most likely because we’re actually feeling a bit insecure at the moment. For me personally, if I’m feeling confident, it doesn’t matter to me what anyone else around me is doing or how they look because I feel good about myself and my worth. I don’t need to compare or compete with anyone because I know I’m good as I am. It’s on the days where I’m not feeling so great about myself and feeling insecure that I will start to compare myself and then feel even worse because I’ll feel like I’m lacking in some area. So my answer to jealousy is to do what you can to better yourself and get to where you want to be.

Are you feeling insecure because of your acne which then makes you jealous of others with clear skin? Or are you insecure about your weight so that you then feel jealous of others who are at a healthier weight? Do what you can to fix those issues so that you have nothing to feel bad about. Don’t be mad at someone just because they have something that you want. Instead use those people as motivation and inspiration to work on yourself and then achieve those things that you are longing for and were once jealous of.

I know it’s not easy to just flip the switch and to start using any negative feelings you may have and turn them into positive actions, but it is well worth it. In the end, you will be someone that people want to spend time with because you don’t carry the negative traits that come along with being jealous. You will be someone who is more bright and positive because you will have used your energy towards bettering yourself instead of hating others and being bitter.

I’m telling you, a majority of the things your self conscious of can be worked on. I used to be heavily over weight, have a deeper voice, a negative attitude and mindset about everything, brittle frizzy hair, cystic acne filled face, and so many more negative attributes. I didn’t like the overall person I was because not only did I not look the way I wanted but I also had a horrible attitude to couple that. So I literally sat down and thought of who I want to be as a person. (I did this a lot when I was 12 and 13). I like to draw so I would draw out the person I want to be. I wanted to be sweet and gentle and kind. I wanted to be loving and affectionate. I wanted to be someone who walked with grace and was well poised. A lot of these things didn’t come naturally to me so I really had to work on them, and so I did.

It took some time but I slowly started to become the person I always wanted to be. All that is to say that the very person you’re jealous of, you can be. Whatever it is they have, you can attain. I would say at least 90% of the change you want is within your control. That’s a lot that you have power over. You can be the exact person you want to be and that is so liberating to hear! You don’t have to be bitter that you’re not like so and so or don’t have a certain thing that they do. You can work on bettering yourself to the point that your days of being jealous will be far and few between; to the point that it’s rare for you to have one of those days. You have the power to be who you want to be. It’s all up to you.

Tell me, what did you guys think of this article? Was it informative or helpful? I sure hope it was. Being jealous is no fun for anyone sitting in that room. I want you to have as many good days as possible and to be so confident about yourself that you don’t really long to be like anyone else because you are content and happy with the person you’ve worked hard to become. Please let me know what you guys thought of this article because I just love to hear from you. I hope you guys have a good rest of your day (or for those like me, a good night). I’ll see you in my next one.

Bye,

PaulaπŸŒ™

Rediscovering My Love For Reading

Growing up, I always loved reading. I mean, you could catch me for hours at a time with my nose in a series of books. Even after coming home from a long day of school and doing all the book work that it entails, including my homework in the evening, I would still want to do more reading; just for fun. I would often fall asleep with 10+ books in my bed because one of my favorite things to do was to interchange between a variety of books, reading whatever I was inclined to at the moment before blissfully drifting off to sleep. I was a huge bookworm, that was my thing and as a result I had such a great imagination and an amazing ability to write. But to be honest, I haven’t delved that deep into books in a looong time; probably about 10 years to be exact.

The last time I actually read a book and finished it was close to 3 years ago! So what happened? How did this book lover suddenly neglect that love for so many years? Well it all started when High school rolled along. Once the book work amplified like it did, I just had no time for reading. I often stayed up till 3 in the morning just to get my homework done and most of the time, it still somehow wouldn’t be complete. So with working non stop on school work and with no time to even consider having a hobby or to even get a solid night’s sleep, any extra reading just went right out the window. I had no time or energy for it. Once I finished with schooling, I quickly got married and had a baby. While my daughter was still in the baby stage, I again had barely enough time or energy for any reading. But now that my girl is 3.5 years old and very much independent, I now find that after all these years I finally have extra time for my literary endeavors.

I’ve just started reading Pride and Prejudice (which is embarrassing to say considering it’s a classic). I decided to just start with a tried and true book since I had no idea where to start. As a side note, I just can’t believe how much brain power it takes to read. To focus all your attention on one thing, to picture the scene, and to decipher the advanced language that is being used; and to think that I used to do that all so effortlessly as a kid! It’s so sad to think, but for a while when I could’ve read a book, I opted instead to watch videos because it was just the easier thing to do, it didn’t required no effort at all. Now my mind is really being challenged to work harder and use my imagination once again.

I want to start a series here where I review books that have films based on them. Then I want to also review the movie and talk about how true it was to the book and which one I preferred. From my experience, the book is always better than the movie but who knows, maybe I’ll come across a movie that will change my mind.

Tell me, what do you guys think? Are you trying to learn to love reading again or is it a love you’ve never strayed from? And how do you feel about me starting the movie and book review series? I think it’ll be fun. It’ll be something I can really see myself enjoying and I hope you guys will too. Please give me your book recommendations down below too. I’m in desperate need of some.

Hope you enjoyed!

-PaulaπŸ’›πŸŒΊπŸŒ΅

How I Transformed My Skin And Finally Got Rid Of My Cystic Acne (With Pictures)

Before: On the right, After: left
Both with no makeup and no filter. What a difference!

(*Little disclaimer: I am not a doctor by any means. This is just what I found through my research and what ultimately worked for me. So please do your own research and check with your doctor first before trying any of these things.*)

If you didn’t know me before I had my cystic acne, you would never be able to tell that it was something I once struggled with. I don’t have any scars, discoloration, or deep indents left on my face. It wasn’t always like that though. It actually wasn’t until these past two years that I was finally able to smooth out my skin and get rid of all traces of my past acne. But to see how I finally ended up with smooth, acne-free skin, I think it’s important that we go back to the start, when my acne first began to make an appearance.

I started getting acne when I was in 5th grade at only 11 years old. At that time it was simply bumps all across my forehead and that’s where it remained. There was no redness to my skin but the bumps were still noticeable so I always made sure I had bangs to help cover it all up. That was 5th grade.

There was no hiding it; the acne consumed my face! I was already 19 by this time and still struggling with the scars

It wasn’t until 6th grade when I started getting the cystic acne all along my jaw. That would be the start of years and years of battling with this extreme type of acne. I actually had a teacher once tell me “You think I’m listening to you when you’re talking to me? I’m just staring at all the acne on your face. You kids need to wash your faces.” That was so crushing to hear and just overall a really harsh thing to say to a 12 year old. But you know, I wish it was as simple as that. I tried so many soaps like Clean and Clear, Proactive, apricot scrubs, even a sugar scrub. Those cleansers either did nothing for me or they just aggravated my acne more. I also tried tea bags and toothpaste on my face, all home remedies that many people swore by. I was willing to try anything, no matter how painful. I cried many times throughout these different treatments because a lot of the time they hurt so much and it was so frustrating that none of them even worked. So after trying everything we possibly could have, my mom took me to a dermatologist.

Even with makeup, there was no hiding the bumpy texture m scars left behind.

My dermatologist prescribed me about 5 medications in total. There were about 2 or 3 creams I had to put on at night, one for the day, and an oral antibiotic. At first, they worked and I was so ecstatic! I thought that this was it. That I could see the sun over the horizon, I could see the end to this long fought battle. That was of course until it stopped working.

It was all down my neck too so I was super self conscience of ever tilting my head back- that meant no looking up and no throwing my head back in laughter either.

You see the thing is that bacteria can become antibiotic resistant. They get used to that antibiotic and learn how to become stronger so that it no longer works on them. (I’m not sure if I’m getting that explanation 100% right but based on my research, that’s how I understand it.) That’s exactly what happened to me. After being on my antibiotics for 2 years, my body became resistant to it. It no longer worked and my acne came back stronger than ever. (The pictures you’re seeing above are not even the actual acne ones, those are just the scars. So imagine all those scars, plus oozing puss, redness, and lumps and bumps all along my jaw and neck. It was not a pretty sight.) At this point, my doctor thought to prescribe me with an even stronger antibiotic. I would have to take it two times a day and the side effects for that one would be: yellow teeth, blue skin, dizziness, and fainting, just to name a few. I am not even joking, those were the actual side effects. So I thought to myself, I may end up up looking ugly with all these side effects but at least I’ll be acne free right? That is a huge joke if you could not tell πŸ˜‚ So even though I was reluctant, I decided to give it a try. I literally took 3 doses of that medication before those side effects started kicking in. I started to feel dizzy while walking to school, going up and down the stairs, and getting onto the bus. It was to the point that I almost fell several times in one day and it felt like it was out of my control, like I wouldn’t be able to stop my body if it began to fall. So after that, I realized I needed to find a different solution. I just couldn’t keep getting on stronger and stronger antibiotics each time they stopped working and I didn’t like the fact that there seemed to be no end in sight when it came to taking all these medications. I knew that couldn’t be healthy, especially long-term. So I began my search for a holistic approach to solving my acne once and for all.

Now this face is as smooth and scar-free as can be. I’m happy to say too that this is without any filter whatsoever. I’m really proud of all my hard work and research finally paying off. It’s been a long road but I’ve stuck with it.

Through my research, I learned just how harmful antibiotics are to our gut and overall health. I learned how your gut’s health really impacts every other function in your body so if it’s not healthy, then you won’t be either. I also learned how you shouldn’t be on antibiotics for no more than 2 weeks. I was on them for 2 years and my doctor wanted to continue with that regime even longer! I don’t know why she would be OK with having me take them for so long. I trusted her though and did exactly as she said with no question (I was only 12 so can you really blame me?) Looking back, I really think that it was my unhealthy diet that started my acne in the first place but I think taking the antibiotics exasperated the problem even more so that it took a whole lot more work to heal myself by the time I had finished the antibiotics after those few years. So once I knew I needed to make a whole lifestyle change to heal my gut and thus cure my acne, I looked into how I could go about doing that.

I believe at that point I had leaky gut syndrome especially with all the abuse my gut had gone through with years of antibiotic use. Many sources said to heal leaky gut, you would have to remove dairy and gluten from your diet since they just caused more inflammation, so I did. After removing the inflammation causing foods, I learned that I needed to also be sure to restore my gut’s healthy microbiome with a bunch of probiotics. So I took supplements, drank kombucha and apple cider vinegar, and just about took every gut loving thing I could while at the same time avoiding anything that caused inflammation like processed foods and keeping sugar to a minimum. Doing these things helped me to finally get rid of my acne. But I was still left with the scars you see above for years later. So how did I finally get rid of those?

I’ll save you a lot of time and money of having to do your own research and I’ll fast forward you to the products that truly worked for me. I finally found the cleanser that worked for me: Cetaphil. It’s specifically designed for people with sensitive skin and my skin adores it! I’ll try different cleansers from time to time just out of curiosity and to see if there’s anything better out there, but right away I’ll just start breaking out. For some reason my skin just really loves Cetaphil so I stick with that. (I’ll link all these products below for you guys so you know just where to get them.)

Next, buying an exfoliating brush for my face (along with a massage head) really helped to smooth out the lumpy texture my skin once had. My face really responded well to a cheap $4 brush I found at Marshall’s. I noticed that every time I would massage my face, my scars would smooth out, to the point that I don’t have them anymore. I would apply a good amount of pressure to my face while I was doing this to bring some blood flow and redness to my skin (but not so much that it hurts). In the beginning, I would massage for 60 seconds everyday. But once I realized I didn’t need it as much, I just did it for less and less time. Massaging my face is what got rid of my bumpy texture for sure. It helped to soften and smooth my skin. It was a huge game changer!

Another important item was Rosehip oil. That helped to get rid of the discoloration on my face. Keep in mind though that with these things, you need to give them time. I would say it took about 3 months to notice a huge difference with the discoloration. So just keep at it. At least you know that it will work, you just need to give it some time and make sure you’re buying a quality oil (not one from the dollar store). I would drench my face in oil every night (I still do, especially to help prevent any fine lines and wrinkles.) But don’t worry if you have oily skin, because I do too and I still put oil on my face. Putting oil on your face does not cause more acne, that’s just a myth and I’m living proof of that. It was actually when I avoided any oil in my face products when I would have tiny breakouts all over. Keeping my skin dry just exasperated my acne. Your skin needs moisture so don’t be scared to give it some. Just try it and see how it works for you.

Another game changer was witch hazel. Witch hazel really helped to reduce the appearance of my pores. They used to be huge! But wiping my face with witch hazel day and night helped to tighten the look of my skin. My mom was even shocked when she saw my face without any makeup and realized just how tight my skin was looking. By using witch hazel, it’s helped my face to look pore less (as if I’m wearing foundation). I also notice that using witch hazel helps to keep breakouts at bay. It’s only when I’m not using it (or have just eaten really bad the day prior) when I’ll actually breakout. So witch hazel is a must. It’s a staple that I still use to this day.

So that is the complete guide to how I finally got rid of my cystic acne and all the scars that came along with it. It literally took me years and years to finally get the smooth, clear skin I have today (10 years to be exact)! I think what took the most time was trial and error; just having to try so many different things to get to the root cause of my problems and see what worked for me. But hopefully with me condensing what I’ve learned during all that time into one blog post, your journey to clear skin will be a lot faster than mine was. I still think you may have to tweak your regime here and there to suite your personal skin type and see what your body responds best to. But I still think you’ll get there a whole lot faster than I didπŸ˜‚ I think really understanding inflammation and how your body responds to it is key.

We need to be healthy internally in order for that glow and radiance to project from our skin. I think it would be in vain to religiously stick to a skincare regime while at the same time continue to eat junk and processed foods. Your body will not be tricked. The true answer to clear skin is eating healthy. You may have to play around with foods to see what agrees with your body and what may be triggering your acne. For example, maybe you can’t do dairy (or at least not a lot of it) whereas maybe your friend can eat all the dairy in the world and still have beautiful skin. Everyone’s body is different so you’ll just have to play detective and see how your body responds to foods. What may be healthy for one person may cause irritable bowels for another. Just play around with it, see what works for you, and maybe use this guide to help you on your journey to clear skin. I honestly thought I was eating healthy at the time and you may feel that way too. But if your skin is so irritated and inflamed, there’s something going on that your body does not like and it’s trying to let you know.

I hope this article is able to help you guys save a whole lot of time. If you liked it, please give it a like down below and let me know what you thought of it. Are you currently trying to clear up your acne or is it something you once struggled with? I’d love to hear from you!

Links:

  1. Cetaphil- https://www.amazon.com/Cetaphil-Gentle-Cleanser-Types-Ounce/dp/B07GC74LL5/ref=sr_1_5?dchild=1&keywords=cetaphil&qid=1590380998&sr=8-5
  2. Rosehip Oil- https://www.amazon.com/Radha-Beauty-Certified-Organic-Rosehip/dp/B00LNOV8JO/ref=sr_1_8?dchild=1&keywords=rosehip+oil&qid=1590381118&sr=8-8
  3. Massage Brush- (the one I originally used had hard bristles for the massage head but this was the closest match I could find on Amazon) https://www.amazon.com/Face-Brush-Cleansing-Exfoliating-Exfoliation/dp/B07TFH7RKZ/ref=sr_1_257?crid=9QMP2MAQ3NE2&dchild=1&keywords=face+brushes+for+cleansing+and+exfoliating&qid=1590381527&sprefix=face+%2Caps%2C287&sr=8-257

Till next time,

Paula

How To Organize Your Pantry (A Cute and Definitive Guide To Finally Getting It Done)

I have been seeing the cutest pictures on Pinterest for organized pantries for years now. It’s always been a goal of mine to get my pantry to look just like that (with my personal touch of course). But every time I opened up my those pantry doors, I felt overwhelmed! There was just so much clutter, so much mess. Where would I start? But being in quarantine as we are, I ran out of things to do. I had pretty much organized everything else so I thought now is the time. Now is the time to (finally) get it done. So I did and it ended up not being as complicated as I thought. I wanted to share with you guys how you can do the same and with no stress at all. It’s simple really.

First, I got some containers. The ones I got from the top row were from Walmart. I bought them months ago but they always have them there so they should be in stock when you check. (I’ll try to link them below for you all.) I just bought a couple, maybe about 7. We also had some large and small mason jars around the house so I used those up too. I filled those up first and as I ran out, I would jot down on paper the foods that were left to be contained. Then I would buy a few more containers. I found the small glass ones at Target for only $6. And then for the bottom row, I ordered those on Amazon for $40 all together.

You’ll want to have the labels with you from the very start so you can label as you go. You wouldn’t want to mix up the baking powder and baking soda as you’re putting them in jars. I ordered my labels from Amazon (again). They have such a wide variety and in so many styles. They even had one that was called Farmhouse which I know a lot of people are liking. I chose the script ones because they felt more girly and just more of my style. For the whole set, I paid $14. I’ll try to link those below too.

When you’re putting your food in their containers, you’ll want to make sure you’re matching them up with a size that’s going to work for you. For example, when picking a jar for the chocolate chips, I made sure to use a smaller one. That’s what works for us because we never need to have a bulk supply of them in our house. But when it came to something like flour, I did use a large jar because I like to do a lot of baking so I want to have a good supply on hand. So just think of what will work for you and your needs. Maybe your family makes a lot of things that require chocolate chips. In that case, you may want to go with a larger jar for them since you’ll need more on hand. It’s all about what works best for you.

Next, we’re going to talk about decorating (one of my favorite topics!) I started off with getting the two wicker baskets with the pink pom poms. They’re actually from the nursery section in Target so they’re really supposed to be used in a baby’s room. But I thought that they were just so cute and just my style (girly and a bit bohemian) so I bought them anyway. I remember I had actually hesitated with these. I thought it would be foolish or ridiculous for me to use a baby item in my pantry. But then I thought, I really like these and who cares if someone thinks it’s weird. Now I am just so happy with the decision I made! I think they look perfect and they give just the look I was going for. So just buy things that are your style and don’t worry what people will think about it. I thought these baskets would be perfect for small snacks and bars that we could store in there, so that’ what I use them for.

Next, I used the wood like contact paper to give our shelves a bit of a makeover. We just moved into this home 6 months ago, but the shelves had some stains and were peeling in some areas. So I thought a simple way to liven them up was to use some contact paper. This one I also got from Amazon. It was $11 a roll and I ended up ordering 2 more of these. In the picture above, I have just one shelf lined but I plan on doing all of them. The contact paper ended up looking so nice in person! It looked really natural and just like a real block of wood. My husband who was skeptical about how good contact paper would look was actually really impressed with how it came out too. I will say, some of the sides rolled up a bit so I just bought some invisible tape to keep those down. I haven’t put it on yet, but I imagine that it wouldn’t really be visible.

Next are the stickers! I ordered some water bottle stickers that people will often stick on there. I’m hoping that will make them more resistant and last longer. They have so many cute ones to choose from and again in all different styles so you’re sure to find ones you like. These were from Amazon and were only $5. And again with these, I hesitated for a moment thinking it might be weird to have stickers on our containers, what would people think or say? But I had to remind myself, this is my style. I think they’re cute and it makes me happy every time I see them so I knew I just had to do it. And again, I am so glad I did! I love the way they came out and now every time I open up my pantry, I can’t help but have a huge smile on my face because it just all brings me so much joy! And that’s what it’s all about.

So there you have it, my simple guide to finally tackling your pantry and getting it organized. I’ve been married for going on 6 years now and this is the first time I’ve ever organized our pantry so that should show you how daunting I thought it was going to be. I had put it off for so many years! In reality it only took me a few days and I would just dedicate maybe about 2 hours on each of those days to work on it. It ended up being a lot of fun too and now I am so satisfied with the finished product. It brings me joy each and every time I go into our pantry and it’s just another way I’m able to make our house into a home. I hope you guys found this to be an informative read and I hope it was able to help you too. Let me know in the comments below how it works out for you. I’d love to see any pictures of your transformed pantries too. 😊

Till next time, I hope you guys have abeautiful day,

Paula 🌼

Links:

  1. Amazon Food Containers- https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07C79SGBC/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o08_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
  2. Wood Contact Paper https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07FSBTGKL/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
  3. Stickers- https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B083BN1KXF/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
  4. Target Glass Jars- https://www.target.com/p/anchor-hocking-glass-cracker-jar-2qt/-/A-47746956
  5. Tiny Mason Jars (I used for candy)- https://www.target.com/p/ball-8oz-12pk-glass-regular-mouth-mason-jar-with-lid-and-band/-/A-14898081
  6. Pom Pom Baskets- https://www.target.com/p/small-paper-rope-decorative-basket-pink-cloud-island-8482/-/A-76167827
  7. Walmart Storage Containers (these weren’t the exact ones but they were the closest I could find on their website)- https://www.walmart.com/ip/DRAGONN-10-Piece-Airtight-Food-Storage-Containers-Kitchen-Storage-Set-DN-KW-FS10/107536945

You Need These Songs On Your Workout Playlist For 2020

When it comes to working out, music is everything! It can get you pumped up and in the mood to give your workout all you’ve got. It can get you excited and full of energy. Music can even make you look forward to your sweat session. It really is key to enjoying your fitness regime. With many of us having the goal of weight loss for this new year, I thought I’d share with you all my favorite workout songs of the moment. I tend to listen more to pop, soft rock, and R&B so if those are your favorite genres, then you might just find some in this list that will become your new favorites. They also range from 90s hits to today’s pop favorites. I hope you enjoy 😊🎢

  1. “Why Can’t I?”, Liz Phair
  2. “She’s So High”, Tal Bachman
  3. “There She Goes”, Sixpence None The Richer
  4. “White Flag”, Dido
  5. “Someday”, Sugar Ray
  6. “Only Human”, Jonas Brothers
  7. “Turn Off The Lights”, Nelly Furtado
  8. “Pieces Of Me”, Ashlee Simpson
  9. “Invisible”, Ashlee Simpson
  10. “Sparks”, Hilary Duff
  11. “Island In The Sun”, Weezer
  12. “Sue Me”, Sabrina Carpenter
  13. “Dance Monkey”, Tones and I
  14. “Circles”, Post Malone (clean)
  15. “Take Off All Your Cool”, Sabrina Carpenter
  16. “In My Bed”, Sabrina Carpenter
  17. “Bad Time”, Sabrina Carpenter
  18. “R.E.M”, Ariana Grande
  19. “Rock Bottom”, Hailee Steinfeld
  20. “Look At Her Now”, Selena Gomez
  21. “Sign Of The Times”, Harry Styles
  22. “Easier”, 5 Seconds of Summer
  23. “thank u, next”, Ariana Grande (clean)
  24. “Electric Lady”, Janelle Monae
  25. “Boots”, Grayson Chance
  26. “Gonna Get Over You”, Sara Bareilles
  27. “Workin’ On It”, Meghan Trainor
  28. “Sparks”, Hilary Duff
  29. “How Do You Sleep”, Sam Smith
  30. “I’m Like A Bird”, Nelly Furtado
  31. “Youngblood”, 5 Seconds Of Summer
  32. “Goodbye” (clean), Post Malone
  33. “That Girl”, Lindsay Lohan
  34. “Play That Song”, Train
  35. “Needy” (clean), Ariana Grande
  36. “N.A.S.A”, Ariana Grande
  37. “Boyfriend” (clean), Ariana Grande
  38. “Thunderclouds”, LSD
  39. “Beat Of My Heart”, Hilary Duff
  40. “We Are Young” (clean), FUN
  41. “Stranger”, Hilary Duff
  42. “Lush Life”, Zara Larson
  43. “Me Too”, Meghan Trainor

Did you find any songs here that you already like or are excited to give a try? Please let me know in the comments below and let me know some of your favorites too. I’m always looking for new music to listen to.

Till Next Week,

Paula

My Goals For The New Year: 2020

Every year, as some of you may know, I love to set goals for myself. I’m a very goal oriented person. I write down what I want to do and I then I just do it (as Nike would say πŸ˜‚) So I thought I’d share with you guys my plans for this new year. Maybe it’ll help to inspire some out there and in the end, I’d love to hear your goals too. I’d love to get some new ideas. So without further ado, let’s get right into it.

  1. First, I’d like to continue to grow my blog. I’ve been posting regularly now for a few months and taking it really seriously. I’ve seen growth even in that short amount of time so I know that if I keep at it, then I’ll soon reap the benefits. So I just want to continue posting every week, at least once, but two times would be a dream. This is my job now so I want to treat it as one.
  2. My second goal would be to lose at least 10 more pounds. I’m guessing I have about 15 left to lose but I really can’t tell. I know though, that losing 10 would make a huge difference and would leave me with not much extra weight. So I feel that if I can knock out those 10 pounds, it will cause a huge change in the way my body looks and from there I shouldn’t have much more to lose. For those who don’t know, I’ve been losing weight for 4 months now and in that time I’ve lost 22 pounds. It’s really transformed the way I look. I’m so proud of my hard work. But there’s still a bit more I’d like to lose so I can feel my very best and be my most confident self.
  3. Next, I would like to develop a hair care routine and at the same time, grow my hair a few inches more too. I have never had the best hair. And it’s not because I have difficult hair or anything, I’ve just never really known how to care for it. I’ve always had a frizzy head of hair and it was pretty much always a hot mess. It wasn’t until this past year or so where I’ve been using hot tools on my hair and actually getting more of a smoother, shinier look. But now I see the heat damage starting to creep up on me. It’s nothing serious, just a bit on the ends. But I know that If I don’t take care of it now, it’s just going to get worse. So it’s time to finally implement a hair care routine. I’m talking hair serums, deep conditioning, learning to style without heat, the works. I want silky, gorgeous, shiny, long hair, but I know it’s going to take work to get it there. That starts this year!
  4. I also want to start reading books again regularly. I’ve always loved reading ever since I was a kid. But with all the many books we had to read in High school, reading during my leisure time was the last thing I wanted to do. Then after school ended, I got married and soon after got pregnant so all my time and energy went towards my baby. But now that the baby stage is over, I’m finding I finally have that vigor back and with it, a desire to read and to consume knowledge. I want to better myself, I want to get to the root of personal issues I have, I want to learn new things. I can do all of that with reading. I’m starting to get that hunger for devouring books back so I want to feed it before it goes away.
  5. I’m really looking forward to going on daily walks once the weather warms up. We just moved into our new home a few weeks ago so right now we live by a canal. There’s a beautiful path that goes all along it with flowers and greenery that I just can’t wait to walk. It’s still pretty cold here in California, but as soon as the weather warms up, even just a little bit, I plan on walking out there. Ever since losing my weight, I’ve been keeping active everyday. I want to keep that up though even when all my weight is gone and I think walking outdoors is a fun, relaxing way to do so. So as soon as I’m able to, I’ll be out there.
  6. Another thing I’m really looking forward to is upgrading my closet. Now that I’ve lost a good amount of weight, everything is pretty loose and baggy on me. For some clothes that’s perfectly alright, like a sweatshirt for example. But for a fitted dress, it just doesn’t look right when you’re swimming in it. I’ve been buying myself a few items here and there but only if they’re on clearance. That’s simply because I’m still in the process of losing weight. So although I do want some clothes that fit me now, I also don’t want to invest too much into them since I know they won’t be fitting me for long. With the clothes I’ve been buying, I’m starting to get a bit more adventurous with them. I’m not buying just regular old skinny jeans. Instead I’m opting for a fit and flare sort of pant that cinches at the waist and opens wide toward the ankles. I don’t want to just wear casual clothes anymore. I want them to be fashionable and just my style. I don’t want to play it safe. I’ve also been wearing heels more which is something I’ve never done before. It’s just part of my everyday look now. So I’m excited to add to my heel collection (right now I just have 2 πŸ˜‚)
  7. Another goal I have is to have friends and family over a couple of times every month. Since moving into our new home, we’ve had people come over pretty much twice a week, every week. I want to make sure we keep to that pattern and throw fun parties for our friends too. I have a lot of kid themed parties that I can’t wait to have. Not many people throw those parties where we live but I think it’d be so fun for Lulu and her friends. I’ve always been so shy when it comes to having people over. I just always over think it and worry if people are having a good time. But my husband has helped me a lot with not over thinking and as I get older too, I’m less self conscious and shy. I love being hospitable now and I just can’t wait for all the parties we’ll throw and all the memories we’ll make too.
  8. I also want to continue homeschooling my daughter. She’s only a toddler so she’s not technically enrolled in home-school; we’re just practicing. But I want to make sure that I keep up with it, work on it daily, and am seeing progress in what my daughter is learning. Right now she knows her shapes, colors, ABC’s, she can match, and draw really good. I think that’s all so good especially since she’s not even 3 yet. I’d like to teach her phonics next (the sounds each letter makes) and then from there we’ll work on forming words and eventually reading. I think we’re making really good progress. But like I said, I want to work hard to stick with it. If I’m going to be homeschooling her, then her education is in my hands and that’s something I take really seriously. So I just want to make sure that it’s something I can honestly do.
  9. This last one is actually something I’ve been wanting to do ever since I was a kid. I want to maybe write a book this year. Crazy, right! I’m not talking about just an e-book. I want it to actually be a physical book that you can touch and feel. I’d like to write and illustrate it myself to. I would probably start off with a children’s book since it’s a genre I love, I have a daughter of my own who I could read it to, and I love to draw cartoons which would be perfect for a book of that category. It might be a bit of a stretch since I’m still trying to get my blog off the ground; I may have to focus on that first. But I’ve found websites that you can use to help you write and publish your own book. I think it’d be amazing if I could make that a reality this year.

Those are my goals for this coming new year. They’re definitely different from the ones I’ve had in previous years; they’re new and exciting. I’m looking forward to it all. Please do let me know any goals you have for this new year. I’d love to get even more ideas. I just wanted to mention too, if you guys are enjoying my blog and would like to help it grow, please subscribe down below to my weekly newsletter. You’ll basically be emailed a notice only once a week letting you know that I’ve posted something new on my blog. Don’t feel obliged to do it but if you like the things I write and would like to see more, I would deeply appreciate you taking the time to subscribe. Thank you so much 😊🌻

Till next week,

Paula

23 Things Learned In 23 Years Of Life (Part 2)

Last week was part 1 of this series where I shared 12 things I’ve learned in my life. Since the list was so long, I decided to break it up into two posts. This is part 2. It’s heavy and it’s deep…so get ready. 🌻

13. Let God guide you in life. Sorry to include religion if that’s not your thing, but I just need to briefly say that God is the reason why I am so happy today and why my life is where it is. I’ve been in the trenches and in the lowest of lows and God helped me to get out of that. He helped guide me to true happiness in life and avoid paths in life that I almost went down but just would’ve given me misery. So I just have to quickly give thanks and credit to God himself. I wouldn’t be where I am now without him.

14. Figure our what it is you want to do in life so that all your decisions can help lead you there. I know it’s easier said than done but maybe write down a list of things that interest you and perhaps actual jobs you can do surrounding those things. Or if marriage is a major goal for you, think of the qualities you want in a life long mate. That way you can be sure to search that out in the men you talk to and if they aren’t what you’re looking for, you can end it with them and move on. At least then you won’t be wasting your time. Try and think of where you want to be in 5 or 10 years from now so you can set goals that will bring you there.

15 You need to take care of yourself if you want to help care for others. This is a lesson that was especially engraved in me once I had my daughter. You can not serve from an empty cup. You will just find yourself burnt out, exhausted, and constantly irritated. It doesn’t take too much to care for yourself either; eat healthy meals, do your hair, take a hot shower, do a little makeup (if that’s your thing), and most importantly get your rest. You can’t expect a car on empty to go very far so prioritize your sleep if you want to get anything done.

16. Focus on strength training, not cardio. I see so many people, young and old, who workout so much or eat very little but still have a flat butt, lanky arms, and just overall not the shape they want. I wish I could just tell them that all they need is some strength training. And I’m not talking about 2 pound dumbbells; I’m talking about 20 pounds. Strength training has helped give me the curves I have, its given my arms shape, it’s given me structure and definition in my face and body, a sculpted back, abs, and so much more. You can see all my muscle definition even though I still have some weight to lose and that’s because of strength training. Some people believe that once they lose the fat everything will be toned, but the truth is that you need strength training to give you that definition. If you have to choose one over the other, I’d say skip out on the cardio and focus on the weights. And I know a lot of people fear getting bulky, having a thick neck, and large shoulders. Trust me, I get it. I don’t like that look either. The thing is though, it takes a lot of focused effort, a specific kind of diet, and really heavy lifting to attain that bulky look. So it’s not just going to happen on it’s own overnight.

17. You don’t need to keep anyone toxic in your life. Whether that be family or a friend that you’ve known for a really long time. Don’t feel obliged to keep anyone in your life who’s constantly bringing you down, causing problems in your life, and who is overall a negative influence in your life. That’s draining and exhausting. You don’t need that.

18. Never look to a guy to make you feel whole. If you do, you’re heart will always be in their hands. If they cheated on you or hurt you, you may believe that’s what you deserved. Don’t let any other person define you. Be whole enough on your own. Be complete on your own. That way if a guy comes into the picture, he will just add to your happiness. If he is the only reason for you to be happy, then you will constantly be unsteady because any little thing he does could make your whole earth shatter. I know it’s easier said than done. This is something I had to learn too but it’s necessary and vital. We can’t rely on someone else for our happiness because what would we do if one day they’re gone? You can’t spend your days with that anxious thought always in the back of your head. Look within yourself to see why you don’t feel whole on your own. Why do you feel the need to be validated by someone else? Once you answer those questions, you can start on the road to inner happiness and satisfaction. People are unpredictable so you wouldn’t want your whole life to lie in the hands of someone else.

19. Love is far superior to romance. I know that may be hard to believe, especially with the way movies make it out to be. But trust me, love is so much better and is long lasting. Romance is so quick lived and often dies out. You can certainly have romance and be deeply in love with your spouse, but often that takes more effort since you’ve guys have been together so long and its not the beginning stage of your relationship. Often times, as ladies, we can be suckers for romance (I know I am). It can sweep us off our feet and blind us to any red flags or toxic behavior that the guy may be exhibiting. But as someone who has experienced both, I have to tell you that the truth is love is the better option. It’s everlasting. Love is there for you when you’re at your worst moments in life. Love is there to support you and help you through life. That’s what a guy does when he loves you. The romantic guy often just wants to be there for the good parts and as soon as you’re having a hard time, they’re gone. And of course I’m not saying this is true of all romantic guys. It’s possible for a guy to be both in love with you and also romantic. But I’m talking more about those guys where that’s all they really offer. They’re a smooth talker, know just what to say, and are very romantic, but it doesn’t go any further than that. But sometimes because we love the romance so much, we’ll ignore the fact that he’s not so great as an actual boyfriend. And that leads me to my next point.

20. Don’t ignore the warning signs and the red flags! Often times we may be so head over heels for a guy and love the way they make us feel that we ignore all the ways they’re bad for us. We live for those high points in the relationship because it makes us feel like we’re walking on air. But be wary. Keep your eyes open. From my own experience, the most romantic, smooth talking guys were actually really terrible people and I realized that with the deeper I dug. I found out that they were going around talking to so many other girls in just the same way; they didn’t really care about me personally. That is a terrible person who is not going to change just for you. He just doesn’t respect women as a whole and he shows that in the way he acts. Love is just a game for people like that. It builds their ego knowing they can get so many girls and they usually don’t care if you get hurt in the process. It makes him feel good having the reputation of a “heart-breaker”. But often times we may still stick around though because he says the most perfect things and makes you feel incredible. But look beneath the surface. Those are just words; anyone can talk but it’s a whole other thing to walk. The fact that he’s not giving you his full attention and toys around with other girls hearts says a lot about what he thinks of you. He doesn’t think you’re worth it. He feels that you’re just worth part of his time. Don’t try and stick around and hope that he’ll change because more than likely that’s just the way he’s gonna stay. If he’ll disrespect you now, he’ll continue to do it. The honeymoon stage of when you first meet a person is supposed to be a time where you’re really trying to impress the other person and put your best foot forward. But if he’s treating you so negatively now, I’d be scared to see just how ugly it’ll get as years pass and he get’s even more comfortable with you. I want you to see that and not go any further with him. See the warning signs and run for the hills. (I’m sorry if this came off as harsh but when you’re in this situation, sometimes you just need someone to be blunt and give it to you straight. It can be so easy to overlook those things but if 5 years down the road you’re married to this guy and have children with him, it won’t be so cute having him still act like this. You’ll be kicking yourself wondering why you ever stayed with him. I just want you to avoid all that pain and regret.)

21. Don’t allow social media to break up your relationship. I’ve heard that many couples have actually divorced over it too. That’s so sad to me. Understand that social media is not real life. You’re relationship with your partner is far more important (and real) than anything on your phone. If it bothers them that you follow a certain person or like certain posts, just stop doing it. I’ve heard of couples who will fight that to the core. They’ll say “well it’s my right to do it. You can’t tell me what I can and cannot do.” and the list goes on. Why be so adamant about following certain people like that? Why is that so much more important to you than how you’re mate is feeling? Social media is whatever to me. I use it mainly as a business tool and to share photos with family. Any accounts I follow are just for fun. I really don’t care if my husband wanted me to delete all my accounts today, I would just do it. Social media is just not important to me. And the fact that people would have actual arguments with their loved one because they don’t want to unfollow a certain person? That’s unbelievable. Just remember that at the end of the day social media is not a person. So if your mate were to leave you over it, you would be all alone. And for what? It’s just not worth it. Let your pride go, let your ego down, and just listen to your mate’s feelings. Make their happiness a priority far before social media.

22. You can be body positive and still want to lose weight. I know this is a big debate, it often times causes arguments, and everyone has their own opinion on it. Here’s mine: yes, I believe you can still lose weight while also loving yourself and your body. You don’t have to hate your body in order to lose weight. Just recently I’ve lost 22 pounds and am still trying to lose about 10 pounds more. Even at the beginning of my weight loss journey, I still thought I was cute. I was never repulsed or disgusted with myself. And when it came to losing weight, I never resorted to starving myself or putting myself on a super restrictive diet that made me want to gag. I think often times, that may have been the experience of others when they first tried losing weight (I know I did the same thing when I was 12) so I think that’s what they relate to when it comes to losing weight, as if that’s the only way that it can be done. I would actually argue that I’m showing my body more love by trying to get rid of extra weight that is only causing health problems. I’m eating healthier and making sure I’m more active throughout the day. I think caring for my body in that way is much more loving.

23. And finally number 23! I should make this one good since it’s the last one, right? Ok here it goes: always do what’s right. I know that sounds so cheesy, so dull, and boring. But hear me out. Often times when you’re trying to be morally and ethically good as a person, it can be hard. It can be especially hard when we see people who are doing things so wrong and bad in life and yet seem to get away with it and even prosper. But the truth is, we will always pay for our actions in the end. Sooner or later those consequences will be knocking on our door. For example, if you did bad, cheated on your mate, and thought that they would never find out if you never told, guess what. Those things will always, always come out. You will face those consequences sooner or later. You can’t avoid them. Or if you did right in life, you will see good things come your way. You will avoid drama, arguments, and a lifetime of chaos by doing things right. In my life, I have always made the right decisions, I was always the good girl. At times it felt like why, why do I have to work so hard at doing good when this person is doing so many terrible things and yet seems to be prospering. Again, the truth will always come out. Years later I now see it. I see the misery that is their life, how they are struggling, and are alone due to their wrong behavior, and I see how everything in my life is seeming to align all at the same time. Everything is just right and just as I want it to be in life. I’m not trying to brag, that’s why I’m keeping it real vague and brief. But just know that those people who are doing wrong, even if you can’t see it now, they are (or will soon be) paying for their course in life. It may be something that takes years and years for them to fix (and sometimes it may be something that they’ll just have to struggle with for the rest of their lives). So don’t feel that it is in vain that you do things right. Know that soon you will see the reward for all your hard work and then you’ll be so grateful that you made the decisions you did and avoided so many problems in life.

So guys, there you have it: 23 things I’ve learned in my life. I hope you can take away at least one tip from this that you found helpful. In my life I’ve learned so many things, even as a young person. A big part of that is listening to the experiences of others. So please be open to hearing what older and wiser ones have to say. They’re just trying to help you avoid mistakes that they possibly have made in life or have seen others make. Then that way you can avoid so much hurt in your life. Weigh each decision out carefully. It can be so quick to make a decision that may impact you for the rest of your life so think things through. I’d love to hear from you guys and hear any bits of wisdom that you have. Please share! πŸ™‚

Till next time,

Paula Moral

23 Things Learned In 23 Years Of Life (Part 1)

This past Friday I turned 23. I’ve honestly have always felt older than what I actually am so even though I’m 23 now, I feel like I’m actually 27. How exactly would a 27 year old even feel? I do not knowπŸ˜‚ It’s just always been that way with me. People tend to think I’m older than I am too. They’re genuinely surprised when I tell them my real age. They say I’m just so mature for my age and seem so wise. So I thought I’d to share with you some of the “wisdom” I’ve acquired after being on this earth for 23 years. It’ll be fun so let’s dive right into it!

  1. The people you went to school with will not be in your life as an adult. You may never even seen them again (unless of course you want to) so don’t worry about the high school drama or cliques, who’s popular or anything else like that. It all means nothing in the real world.
  2. If a guy really likes you and wants to be with you, he’ll show it. You shouldn’t have to try and decode his en-cryptic messages of emojis. I hate all those games honestly. I don’t have time for that. That’s why I’m so glad I married an older, mature man too because he didn’t play those games. He shouldn’t ignore your texts for days. You shouldn’t have to read between the lines to see how he’s really feeling. He should make it clear and if you’re confused, ask him. If that scares him off, then good. He wasn’t ready for a real relationship anyways.
  3. Do your own thing in life. Many times what others want you to do may be the exact opposite of what feels right to you. At the end of the day though, you’re the one who will have to deal with the consequences of your decisions. You’re the one who will be left to live your life and those other people won’t have to. So try and do what makes the most sense to you. I mean just look at my life for example, I left High school at 16, got married at 18, and had a baby at 20. But I had a certain vision for my life so I made the decisions that I felt would help me to get there, and it did. So although I did not do things the way people normally would have liked me to, that doesn’t matter. I got to where I wanted to be and I didn’t have to waste time doing things the conventional way.
  4. Not everyone is sincere. It may be hard to believe if you yourself are a sincere, honest hearted person yourself, but not everyone has good intentions. Not every “friend” wants the best for you. It’s something you learn in life. And it may be hard to believe because you may think, why would a person fake a friendship just to then gossip about you and stab you in the back? It’s sad but unfortunately it happens. There are some people out there who are like that. You don’t have to be paranoid and not trust anyone. Just be cautious and try to get to know your friends before you tell them your personal issues. It may happen to you, where you find out that a “friend” was acting more like an enemy behind your back. In that case, just drop them. You don’t need that in your life and there are so many other people who are looking for real friends like you.
  5. You have the power to become the person you want to be in life, to better yourself in anyway you’d like. Whether that be financially, physically, or even just personality-wise, you can do it. If you’d like to be kinder and not as bitter and cynical, then you can work on improving your personality. You do not have to be defined by your childhood, by the way your family acted, nothing. Oftentimes, if someone has a temper then they might say something like, ‘well my father always had a temper too so I can’t help it’. But the truth is, you can help it and that’s good news! You don’t have to stay stuck with traits that you don’t really like. It may be hard to reprogram your brain with the way you think and how you react to things, but it can most definitely be done. I was able to do it, so I know you can too.
  6. Some people will hate you just because. Again, this may be something that’s hard to grasp, but some people just won’t like you and they may not have any real reason why they even feel that way. You may treat them so nice. You might be so friendly and helpful to them and still they just won’t like you. Don’t sweat it. Some people you just can’t win over. But that’s OK because there will be so many other people who do like you, so focus on them.
  7. We all have those people in our lives who we haven’t talked to in years and we think to ourselves, why did I ever lose touch with them? Then you get to talking with them and end up seeing just how negative and toxic they are to your lives. Then you realize that that’s why you broke off contact with them. So my advice to you, leave people from the past, in the past. I wouldn’t say that applies to each and every person but as a general rule of thumb, it’s usually what’s best. There’s always a reason why you stopped talking to certain people or why a certain friendship didn’t work out. Just trust that if you’ve stopped talking with certain people, it’s probably for a really good reason so be wary about allowing them back into your life.
  8. There will be ebbs and flows to your relationship. That’s OK and perfectly normal. So don’t think that there’s anything wrong with you or your partner or that maybe you guys just weren’t meant to be together. That’s something that would happen in any relationship so don’t worry.
  9. Be humble. There is so much in life that we don’t know about so try not to speak on things that you don’t know the facts on. I’ve done it too. I can almost guarantee that we’ve all done it. Be open to learning more and realize that you don’t know it all, not at 23, 43, or even at 63. Try not to comment on the lives of others because more than likely, you don’t know the full story.
  10. It’s easy to find people who will want to sleep with you but its hard to find someone who will love you unconditionally. So when you find someone like that, who really loves you, hang on to them and don’t let them go. It may be true that people will want to be with you physically but that’s so different from someone who will actually commit to you for your whole life. I’ve seen the sad outcome of women who have taken their significant others for granted. They’re still alone at 40 years old and have spent years trying to find true love again. It’s not easy to find so hold onto your love and appreciate them.
  11. Take care of your skin now! I’ve been lathering my face with oil every night since I was 12 years old and recently have been wearing SPF daily. It may seem really premature for me to be doing these things but I rather prevent wrinkles and fine lines. Why take a chance? Just start taking care of your skin now and you’ll thank yourself in the years to come (especially as you get older).
  12. The same goes for your health. You may feel that you’re young and can eat anything you want and don’t have to worry about your health but the truth is that you’ll pay for the way you treat your body sooner or later. In the short term, eating junk food and being inactive will cause you to have low energy, bloat, indigestion, bad skin, body aches, and a whole plethora of problems. In the long term, you can develop diseases that really inhibit your life, you may lose organs or limbs because they’ve shut down due to years of abuse, you may lose your hair, become obese, and the list goes on. So, take care of your health now and you can live a rich, exciting, and fulfilling life. You can do all the things you want to do and your body won’t be able to hold you back.

This is just part 1 of this series since it’s such a long list. Part 2 is already typed up and ready for you guys to see and I gotta say, it’s probably the best piece I’ve ever written. I’m really excited to share it with you guys! But in the meantime, I hope you enjoyed this post. As we go through life, we gain experience and wisdom. The hope is that we’ll learn from it and share what we learn with others too so they can avoid problems. Please let me know any of your pieces of advice for life. I’d really love to hear it and I’d love to know what you thought of this article too.

Till next time,

Paula Moral

5 Things I’ve Learned In 5 Years Of Marriage

With my 5th year wedding anniversary coming up (on December 12th to be exact) I thought it’d be fun to share 5 things I’ve learned while being married for these past few years. I am not a marriage expert or counselor by any means, let me just put that out thereπŸ˜‚. These are just a few of the things I’ve learned while being married. I hope they help.

  1. Just pick up the dirty clothes from the floor and don’t bicker about it. If your spouse has a bad habit that really bothers you, you should most definitely tell them about it instead of just holding in all that frustration. Hopefully they can improve on their bad habit and eventually stop doing it all together, but I wouldn’t recommend that you point it out to them each and every time it happens. That can get annoying for both of you and lead to arguments over something so small. You don’t want to be bickering with your spouse each and everyday, that just leads to constant tension in the house. Keep in mind too that habits are hard to break. Often times they’re done without much thought, it’s just subconscious. So try and be patient. They’re not doing it to purposely annoy you. Their actually probably struggling to break it. You can bring it up from time to time to try and get them to hopefully improve on it but try not to bring it up everyday.
  2. Don’t compare your mate or your relationship to anyone else’s. Every couple, and I mean every couple, has their challenges in marriage. There’s so much that may be happening behind the scenes that you just don’t know about. There will be areas that another couple may be better in, but your relationship will also be better than there’s in other ways too. Try to work on watering your relationship and it will grow. The grass is most definitely not greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it. A friend told me that and I thought it was so wonderfully said…and true! So bottom line, don’t be jealous of someone else’s relationship because they have issues that you don’t know about, we all do.
  3. Communication is so so important! I know this is one we’ve all heard before, but communication is everything! It helps build trust, it avoids needless arguments, and there’s no confusion. You guys will always be on the same page since you’ve clearly communicated everything that’s going on. Be open and honest and talk about everything. Talk about your goals for your finances as a couple. What is it you want to work on saving towards? Be open with where you want your life to be in 5 or 10 years. Let them know if you feel that life has become stale and you need a change. Be honest about everything: even what you’d like to do for the weekend or what time you expect to be home and if there’s any changes to your plans that may cause you to come home later. It’s not about trying to control the other person, it’s simply having respect. You guys are now a unit and if you come home late, it may change the other ones plans (like even simply what time they should cook dinner, if they’ll be putting the kids to bed by themselves, and more). So just try to communicate what you’re feeling and thinking so there can be as little conflict as possible.
  4. Date your spouse. Flirt with your them, text them throughout the day, send them pictures, or funny things you find on social media, just basically treat them like you did when you guys were dating. It does take an effort to do these things since we can get so caught up in our daily lives and the routine of things. It doesn’t have to be all day that you’re texting them but one or two funny or cute texts can go a long way. They show that you guys are thinking of each other and they help keep things fun and exciting between you too. Don’t forget to dress up cute for them too, wear cute pj’s and things like that.
  5. Look within yourself for happiness, don’t rely on your mate for that. With any relationship, you need to be happy with yourself first. You can’t expect the other person to be the answer. If you are feeling bored or unfulfilled, take up a hobby or new job . Your husband/ wife is a life partner, someone to go through experiences with, to support each other, possibly build a family together, and hopefully have fun along the way. But they should not be the only thing in life that makes you happy or the one that gives you purpose in life. I think it’s important to be your own person first. That way you can add to each other’s life and enhance it. Being another person’s only source of happiness is a lot of pressure and can be draining so if you can relieve them of that, it’ll make everyone’s life easier.

So there you have it, my 5 pieces of advice for the 5 years that I’ve been married. I hope these were helpful and were not so repetitive with the advice people usually give married people. What are your tips for married people or those looking to get married? Let me know in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you!

Till next time,

Paula Moral

Get The Look- Everyday Fall Makeup Routine (With Pictures)

I often get compliments on my makeup and people will ask what specific products I’m using. So I thought I’d write it all down in one post for you all to reference to. These will be all the products I used to get the look above. It’s more of a fall look with a little glam in it. This is a look I like to wear on most days during this season. It’s got pink eye shadow, burgundy lips and sparkle on the eyes. But I still feel that it’s not too over the top so it’s a look I feel comfortable wearing everyday. All the products I’ll be naming are affordable ones you can find at Target, Amazon, and Walmart. So without further ado, let’s get right into it.

1. NYX Studio Perfect Photo-Loving Primer (clear)

First I should mention that before anything else, I first use witch hazel to freshen up my face in the morning, then I put on some SPF, and then finally I put on this primer. It has a silicone-like texture to it. I spread it evenly all over my face, neck, and eyelids. I really see a difference with my makeup lasting all day. I’ve tried wearing different primers and I’ve also tried wearing no primer at all. Both times, my makeup didn’t last and it would wear off in patches. It looked really bad, blotchy, and like I had bad skin when in reality it was all because of a bad primer. So primer is a must! It makes a huge difference and the kind you wear matters too. Some are just bad quality and won’t work at all.

2. Milani Conceal & Perfect 2-in-1 Foundation & Concealer (#02 Natural)

I really really love this foundation. I’ve seen so many post about it on Pinterest and I can see why. It feels really lite, like you have nothing on your face but it also has really good coverage. It’s just a medium coverage so if you have lumps and bumps on your face, it most likely will still be visible. But if you have redness like me, it’ll definitely be covered with just a thin layer.

3. NYX Can’t Stop Won’t Stop Contour Concealer (Vanilla)

This is my favorite contouring concealer. It has such high coverage and really brightens up your face. It makes such a difference and really does help to contour your face all on its own, even without bronzer. For reference, I use the color “Vanilla”. I do the basic contouring method of putting it down my nose, on my forehead, a triangle under my eyelids, on my chin, and underneath my cheekbones. Then you just blend with a damp sponge (it gives a more flawless finish that way).You want to dab to blend and not smear or pull. It’ll thin out your coverage (if you do smear) and will just show your skins flaws underneath. Whereas with dabbing, you’re able to build on your coverage so you can apply just how much you need.

4. Rimmel London Natural Bronzer (#027 Sundance)

This bronzer gives sort of a thin coverage (I am trying to find a better one) so I just have to layer it on until I get the desired color I want. I just want it noticeable enough so that it actually is contouring my face and not so light that it becomes the same color as my foundation. I apply this bronzer on the top of my forehead and blend into my hair line, beneath my cheekbones, along my jaw and blend down my neck, and then down the sides of my nose for a more narrow look. It will have harsh lines at first along with the blush, but once you put the finishing powder, it’ll help to blend everything out.

5. Milani Baked Powder Blush (#01 Dolce Pink)

Next I apply this blush to my cheeks and I blend it with the bronzer beneath my cheekbones. That’s pretty much it. I, again, dab it on (instead of smearing) for greater coverage. I dab enough until I get my desired color and until it’s all blended with my bronzer.

6. NYX HD Studio Photogenic Finishing Powder

My next step is this finishing powder. It literally is the best! It helps blend all the bronzer and blush together, it softens your whole look, and takes away all the shine. It lasts me all day! It’s not until late in the afternoon when I’ll need to reapply more. I’ve used cheaper, lower-quality ones, but they all just wear off really soon, in about a few hours after I first applied it. So I’ve learned that the quality of the product really does make a difference. You can’t expect quality results from really cheap products. NYX (my favorite brand of makeup) is very affordable and is actually sold at Target and Walmart now. Just as a tip, Amazon tends to sell most of the NYX products for about half as much as the stores charge. I don’t know why, they just do. So if you’d like to save yourself some money, try ordering your makeup from Amazon.

7. Living Coral Palette By: UCanBeMakeup (From Amazon)

Next I go on to eye shadow, probably my favorite part! For this look, I first use the light pink all the way on the bottom left row (called “Wake”) and put that one all over my lid. Then I put the scarlet that’s right next to it (“Youth”) on the base of my lid. I pat it on till I have full coverage all over my eyelid. Then I move onto the deep wine color all the way on the top right (“Dessert Island”) and work that into my crease. I keep it just in my crease and blend it in so there’s no harsh lines. You just reapply if you want a darker color. I would suggest starting off light though since it’s always easier to apply more if necessary. It can get messy if you need to remove it though. I then just apply a bit of the white sparkle on the far top left (“Lifted”) to the inner corners of my eyes for a little pop. And if you have any fall-out from any of the colors, you can just use your finishing powder brush to swipe away any eye shadow that has fallen on your cheeks.

8. Wet n’ Wild Coloricon Kohl Eyeliner (Brown)

Next, I use this eyeliner pencil to line my eyes. I just do a straight line on the sides of my eyes and that’s it. I don’t line the top of my eyes since I feel that it makes them look smaller. I just feel that it flatters my eyes best when I do it this way. But feel free to play around with it until you find what works best for your eye shape. For example, I cannot do a winged liner look. It just does not look good on me no matter how I do it. So although my method isn’t one you see often, it is one that looks best on me. So don’t try and force a look that doesn’t work with your eyes. You may just have to try something different.

9. L’Oreal Voluminous Primer (White)

10. L’Oreal Voluminous Original Mascara (Blackest Black)

Next are my all-time favorite products, the ones that make the most dramatic difference, this mascara primer and mascara. The primer is so amazing and makes all the difference! I get so many people who compliment me on my eyelashes. They ask if they’re fake and they’re surprised when they learn that they’re not. The primer elongates, separates, and thickens your lashes (just while you’re wearing it of course). You should let it dry for a bit just so it can harden and your lashes can keep that long, thick look. So while I let it dry, I move onto my eyebrows and when I’m done with that, I go back to my eyelashes and apply the black mascara. It’s pretty straight forward when it comes to the mascara. I just sway it back and forth as I work it through my lashes so it can cover them from every angle. I extend it through my lashes on the sides to give a more open look. I also do my bottom lashes. I know some people don’t but I just like the look better that way. I feel that it gives it a more balanced look.

11. E.L.F Instant Lift Brow Pencil (Neutral Brown)

When it comes to my eyebrows, I first brush them through to see what I’m working with. Then I lightly line along the bottom of my eyebrow and the top. I then blend that in with an angled eyebrow brush. I blend it all in until the line I drew is no longer visible. For any sparse areas that need more filling, I just lightly draw it in again and if it looks like harsh, I’ll just lightly blend it again with the angled brush. I might brush through my brows again with the spoolie in case they got bunched up again and I want a cleaner look.

12. NYX Liquid Suede Cream Lipstick (Vintage)

I then move onto my lips. I first always apply lip balm since I feel that it gives your lips a fuller, softer, and more plump look. Plus the color applies more evenly. After I do that, I apply the lipstick. I first outline my lips with the same lipstick applicator. I then coat my lips thoroughly, usually two coats, to get my desired color.

13. NYX Matte Finish Setting Spray

My final step is this finishing spray. I thoroughly cover my face and neck with it to make sure I seal it all in.

I hope you guys found this step by step breakdown of the products I use (and my tips) to be helpful. If you guys like post like this, make sure to let me know by giving it a like or commenting so I know to write more. I hope this was easy enough to follow and if I find any new products I like, I will definitely update you guys.

Till next time,

Paula Moral